The Elephant in the Room

I am fortunate enough to be in a pretty good position in life.  There is one significant problem and to me, its the elephant in the room.  The one everyone can see, but no one will say anything about to me even though it is more than clear by looking at me.  So I will say it for you – “Steph, you are overweight and you need to do something about it.”

There, I’ve said it.

I don’t say this for pity as it is a clinical fact.  I am considered obese.  According to BMI calculators for my height, to be in the normal range, I need to lose between 58-102 pounds.  The 102 pounds I laugh at as the number is so low that even when I was playing 3 sports and was a collegiate athlete I didn’t weight that little, but the 58 pounds…that is more realistic.

I find it very odd though that my own doctor couldn’t be direct with me.  I got the routine message, “If you would just lose 20 lbs that would be a good start…”  Why can’t he give it to me straight?  Instead of letting me know how far off track I had gotten, he made it sound like no big deal.  I hate to say it though, needing to lose 60 lbs IS A BIG DEAL.

I will go on to add that I have terrible eating habits, I used to sleep horribly (that has changed over the last few months for the better), and I always focused my time and energy on my work.  However, if I don’t take care of myself, none of it will matter.  I get sick rather easily, I don’t have as much energy as I would like, and get winded more easily than I would like to admit.

The admission isn’t really the hard part, I know the work I now need to do will be.  But being honest with myself, I need to acknowledge how I got here.  I would be lying if I didn’t say I know how.  I do know exactly how.  Some of it is emotional baggage that I have difficulty letting go, some is due to a time of significant stress and illness where I ate constantly to deal with it and the rest, it creeped on and I let it.

It would have been easy to address it when it was only 10 pounds to get myself back in shape, but I didn’t make the easy choice.  And when it became 25 pounds, I said it was no big deal and I could handle it, but I didn’t.  So now I am here, acknowledging my responsibility in the weight that I have let accumulate and how out of shape I have let myself get.  I see this as part of my journey though.  If I want bigger and better things for myself, that needs to include ME — me as in my health, taking care of my physical body strength, and the energy I can bring to the greatness I want in my life.  I am committing to myself that not only will I look to achieve great goals in other areas of my life, but I will BE one of those goals too and I am willing to put it in writing here and now.

  • Diet Coke, you will be getting removed from my regular diet and replaced with water and tea.
  • At a minimum, an apple will be part of my daily diet – taking that first step towards making sure I eat more fruits and vegetables.
  • Step count — you will be increasing to a minimum of 5000 steps a day.
  • Junk food at my desk while working — “bye, bye”
  • Working out – I currently do none today, I need to make it a priority for 30 minutes at least 3 times a week.

I need to start somewhere and these are my commitments in my journey to take off the weight I need to.  As cute as elephants may be, I don’t want this to be one occupying the room surrounding me any longer.

So there you have it – my truth.  Quoting a very well known verse in the Bible –

“And the truth shall set you free.”  John 8:32

Let me be free to move forward, making my health a priority.  I want to be around for a long time and I want to be healthy to enjoy it.  I would say wish me luck, but I don’t need luck.  I prefer to say, “Watch me go” and asking people to cheer me on as I keep focus to meet each milestone.  60 pounds, I can do this.  One day a time, one pound at a time.

~Steph